ACCEPTS (distract to ride out urges)
Short-term distraction tools to help you survive a crisis/urge without acting impulsively.
ACCEPTS is a set of distraction skills designed to help you ride out intense urges and emotions until they naturally decrease. It's not about avoiding your feelings forever — it's about getting through the crisis moment without doing something destructive.
The ACCEPTS Acronym
- A — Activities — Do something that requires concentration. Clean, exercise, play a game, cook, garden.
- C — Contributing — Help someone else. Volunteer, do a favor, make a gift. Getting outside yourself reduces suffering.
- C — Comparisons — Compare yourself to those less fortunate, or to your past self when things were harder. (Use gently.)
- E — Emotions (opposite) — Generate a different emotion. Watch something funny, listen to uplifting music, read something inspiring.
- P — Pushing Away — Mentally push the situation away for now. Put it in a box on a shelf. You'll come back to it when you're calmer.
- T — Thoughts — Occupy your mind. Count to 100, do a puzzle, recite song lyrics, describe objects in the room.
- S — Sensations — Intense but safe physical sensations. Hold ice, snap a rubber band, eat something sour or spicy.
The goal isn't to avoid your feelings permanently — it's to give yourself time. Intense emotions naturally decrease within 20-30 minutes if you don't feed them.
Real-Life Examples
Scenario: You just found out you didn't get the apartment you applied for, and you're overwhelmed with disappointment. You feel the urge to binge-eat or text your ex. Skill in action: Instead, you use Activities — you put on your running shoes and jog around the block. Then you use Contributing — you text a friend going through a hard time to check in on them. By the time you're done, the wave of despair has dropped from a 9 to a 4.
Scenario: You're waiting for medical test results and the anxiety is unbearable. You keep refreshing your patient portal every 30 seconds. Skill in action: You use Thoughts — you open a crossword puzzle app and force your brain to work on something else. You use Sensations — holding an ice cube in your hand to ground yourself in the present moment. The results will come when they come.
Scenario: Your teenager just told you they hate you and slammed their door. You're flooded with hurt and anger and want to go scream back. Skill in action: You use Pushing Away — you mentally put this argument in a box on a shelf labeled "deal with later." You use Emotions (opposite) — you put on a comedy special that always makes you laugh. Once you've cooled down, you'll have a real conversation.