Problem Solving (change the situation)

When your emotion fits the facts AND the situation can be changed, Problem Solving helps you take effective action to change it rather than just tolerating it.

Problem Solving is an emotion regulation skill used when your emotion fits the facts (it makes sense given the situation) AND the situation can be changed. Instead of just tolerating pain or using Opposite Action, you actively change the problem causing the emotion.

This skill sits in the decision tree after Check the Facts: if the emotion fits the facts, ask "Can I change the situation?" If yes → Problem Solving. If no → Radical Acceptance and Distress Tolerance.

The Steps

  • 1. Describe the problem clearly and specifically. What exactly needs to change?
  • 2. Check the Facts — is this really a problem? Is your interpretation accurate?
  • 3. Identify your goal — what outcome do you want? Be specific and realistic.
  • 4. Brainstorm solutions — list ALL possible solutions without judging them. Quantity over quality.
  • 5. Evaluate solutions — for each option, consider: pros/cons, short-term vs. long-term, impact on relationships, alignment with values.
  • 6. Choose a solution and commit to trying it.
  • 7. Act — put the plan into action. Use DEAR MAN if the solution involves asking someone for something.
  • 8. Evaluate the result — did it work? If not, go back to step 4.
Problem Solving is for situations you CAN change. If the problem is genuinely unsolvable (a loss, an illness, someone else's behavior you can't control), use Radical Acceptance instead. Trying to problem-solve what can't be changed creates more suffering.

When to Use It

  • After Check the Facts confirms your emotion fits the situation
  • When you feel stuck but the situation is actually changeable
  • Relationship conflicts that have potential solutions
  • Work/school problems, financial issues, health situations where action helps
  • When avoidance or rumination has replaced action

Common Obstacles

  • Emotional mind — emotions too high to think clearly. Use TIPP or distress tolerance first, then problem-solve.
  • Perfectionism — no solution is good enough. Remember: a good-enough solution tried today beats a perfect solution never attempted.
  • Overwhelm — the problem feels too big. Break it into smaller sub-problems.
  • Confusing facts with interpretations — always go back to Check the Facts.

Resources